Forgive Me For The Last Time
by slave4kai
Summary: DEDICATED TO PORK STEAK THE GRANDE....


**Hey just a random oneshot I came up with, and I'd like to dedicate this to Pork Steak the Grande, just because your fics are awsome and I love to read them. **

**Song - The Reason, by Hoobastank**

**Enjoy...**

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**Translations**

Baka yaro - Stupid bastard  
  
Baka - Idiot, fool, etc  
  
Damare - Shut up  
  
Gomen – Sorry

**Forgive Me For The Last Time**  
  
**I'm not a perfect person  
There's many things I wish I didn't do  
But I continue learning**  
  
_Why did I have to go and do that?_ The cream-haired dark thought to himself as he sat with his head in his hands.  
  
He slowly lifted his head, staring at his hands to see the dried blood smeared over all them and the fact that the blood belonged to the one he was supposed to care about most, made it a million times worse.  
  
_I'm such a baka; he didn't even deserve it... It was just my usual ways..._ Bakura mentally slapped himself for his actions as he attempted to hold back the tears that started to try and fight their way through. But, Bakura being Bakura, held in the tears, held in his emotions... and held in the truth.  
  
**FLASHBACK**  
  
"Please, Bakura..." the trembling light backed into the corner of the room clutching his arm tightly as the blood seeped through his fingers.  
  
Dark, emotionless eyes glared down at his light, showing no sign of love or mercy for the shaking teen.  
  
"Bakura... I'm sorry... I... I don't know what I've done... But, tell me and I promise I won't do it again!" Ryou said very quickly as tears ran down his pale face.   
  
"You don't know what you've done?" Bakura snapped, leaning down to Ryou.  
  
"N...No..."

"Your very existence is what you've done!" The dark yelled as he yanked away his light's hand from his wounded arm, letting the blood trickle down his arm.  
  
"Bakura! Please! AHHHH!" Ryou screamed out loud as a strong stinging feeling shot through him, the pain growing immensely as his dark dragged the knife through the wound, making it deeper and deeper.  
  
**FLASHBACK FINISH**  
  
"He's never going to forgive me..." Bakura sighed heavily to himself as he surrendered to his emotions and tears began to roll down his cheeks.  
  
"He'll never realise how much I really do love him..." he whispered to himself.  
  
The white haired dark slowly got to his feet and made his way to the bathroom, leaving a smear of blood on the handle when he twisted it.  
  
His chocolate eyes locked onto the mirror and he glared at his reflection. He stared into the mirror, watching the tears drip from his eyes.  
  
"Baka yaro..." He muttered to himself as he turned the tap on.  
  
The water ran all over his hands, washing away the blood as he watched it circle until it fell down the dark drain and it reminded him of his heart, quickly plummeting into the dark abyss of guilt and self hate.  
  
The clear water turned a murky crimson as the final splashes of blood dripped from Bakura's hands and disappeared down the plughole.  
  
**I never meant to do those things to you  
And so I have to say before I go  
That I just want you to know**

* * *

Upstairs and locked away in his shadow filled room, Ryou sat in the far corner his hand firmly pressed against his wounded arm.  
  
The light still trembled from his horrific ordeal, the tears still pouring from his eyes, and the pain still lingered in his mind.  
  
_I thought he was getting better... He even gave me a hug now and then... But now, he did this,_ the young teen thought to himself as he sighed heavily.  
  
His eyes burnt with a slight tingle from all the crying he had been doing, images from the previous hours coming back to him and playing in his mind like a cruel, sadistic horror movie.  
  
**I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
And the reason is you  
**  
Bakura was back on the sofa downstairs leaning forward on his knees. His eyes clamped shut and hands over ears as Ryou's pain filled scream repeatedly echoed through his mind.  
  
"Damare..." He said to himself as he wrenched his eyes open.   
  
The white-haired Yami sighed to himself as he rubbed his eyes in an attempt to be rid of the constant tears that insisted to flow down his pale cheeks.  
  
**I'm sorry that I hurt you  
It's something I must live with everyday  
And all the pain I put you through  
**  
_I thought you could even learn to love me Bakura...  
_  
Ryou's voice echoed through Bakura's mind, causing a soft smile to come over him at the sound.  
  
"I've already learned..." Bakura said in reply, even though he knew that his light couldn't hear a single word he was saying, and the fact he heard Ryou's was sheer luck that the mind link was accidentally switched on.  
  
His mind began to calm as the screams left his thoughts, leaving only the still images of his crying hikari.  
  
_What I'd do to take it all back..._   
  
Ryou's eyes widened and shot towards the door as he instantly thought that his Yami was in the room, but soon realised he was no where to be seen.  
  
"Stupid mind link..." the teen muttered to himself as he removed his hand from his arm, letting the tiny drops of blood seep out freely.  
  
Ryou sat with his knees tightly against his chest as if he was protecting himself from some sort of invisible attacker. His eyes were shut to try and block out the constant image of his Yami's face. Those chocolate eyes staring at him with such anger and hate, the only emotion he ever showed towards his hikari haunted him day and night, watching his every move and following his thoughts like a lost shadow.  
  
**I wish that I could take it all away  
And be the one who catches all your tears  
That's why I need you to hear**  
  
"Gomen Ryou-kun..." Bakura's voice was quiet and weak not like his usual strong and dominant tone that he used all the time, but now... He had no feeling of power and pride, just hate for himself for what he did to the one he was supposed to love for all his life, his hikari, his friend... his Ryou.  
  
**I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
And the reason is You**   
  
_Why am I like this? Why can't I show how I really feel, and just tell Ryou I... Love him.  
_  
The same questions echoed through Bakura's mind as the tears continued to flow each individual tear adding to the ever-lasting pile of guilt that lingered over the cream-haired Yami.  
  
His ears perked up slightly when he heard a faint sound.  
  
"Ryou?" He asked turning around, but the one he desired wasn't there.  
  
It was then when he realised what the sound was. The unmistakable noise of his teen light crying his jade green eyes out.  
  
By now, he thought he would be used to that sound the countless times he had seen him cry, and the countless times he had been the cause of his tears. But this time was different. This time it hurt. Each sorrowing sob that echoed down to his ears stung his heart, each pain filled cry choked his lungs.  
  
**I'm not a perfect person  
I never meant to do those things to you  
And so I have to say before I go  
That I just want you to know**   
  
He ran his hands back through his hair, not being able to take it any longer. The tears got worse, bursting through him like a broken dam.  
  
Getting to his feet he began to pace back and forth, his fists clenched as he listened to his crying love. His eyes were blurry from the droplets of water clouding his vision, the pain he was feeling new to him. Not the physical sort that he could take no matter what. This pain hurt. It hurt like nothing he had ever felt. To him, he could take anything. No blade could cut him, no bullet could kill him, no fire could burn him. But this, this was agony.  
  
Images of Ryou burnt his mind, his eyes seeing nothing but a weeping teen. He wiped his eyes and face, as the feeling grew stronger in him, each second it hurt more like a blunt knife desperately trying to cut through solid steel. It was killing him inside. The emotion raced through him, stampeding through his heart and mind.  
  
**I've found a reason for me  
To change who I used to be  
A reason to start over new  
And the reason is you  
**  
Bakura's fists clenched harder as the tears continued to fall. Not being able to cope with these new feelings his anger began to take over him again.  
  
He grabbed the glass violet vase that lay perfectly centre on the coffee table and threw it at the wall with unbelievable force.   
  
He yelled out at himself as the glass shattered into a million pieces against the wall the single rose that was inside falling to the ground, soaked and broken.  
  
Bakura collapsed to his knees with his face in his hands, crying even harder.  
  
"B... Bakura..." A soft voice muttered from behind him.  
  
His chocolate eyes slowly lifted as he turned his head to see Ryou standing there hugging a small brown teddy and standing at the bottom of the stairs.  
  
**I've found a reason to show  
A side of me you didn't know  
A reason for all that I do  
And the reason is you  
**  
"... Ryou..." The white haired Yami got to his feet and walked over to his hikari, who slightly backed away, the fear still clearly printed in his eyes.   
  
"Ryou... I-" He stopped in mid sentence as his eyes trailed over to Ryou's arm, the blood trailing down his arm, the guilt growing even more.  
  
"Bakura... Do... Do you hate me?" the young light stuttered out.   
  
Bakura swallowed hard at hearing his words. His eyes blurring from the new tears forming at the fact that Ryou thought he hated him.  
  
"I don't hate you Ryou-kun," the dark answered softly and he moved forward taking his light into his arms.  
  
Ryou stumbled back at the unexpected affection. But he quickly dropped his teddy and wrapped his arms around Bakura's thin waist, burying his head in his chest, and clinging to him like a lost child.   
  
"I... Love you Ryou," Bakura whispered into Ryou's ear, his tears dampening the younger one's neck.  
  
"I love you too Kura."

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**The.... end**

**R&R My happy little friends!**

**S4K**


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